...::Seasons of Cecilia..

The O.C

I watched "The O.C"...pretty nice but I still love "One Tree Hill" the best ;)

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 5:10 PM

One hell of a belt ;)

See the title above? I haven't found the perfect belt just yet! I should have bought that red glitter belt last month...urghhh....I wanna go to PA now (Di asked me to come along @ 2pm which it's now actually) but I don't think I can. Nobody is around the office, my dad is out and my brother is in Singapore (lucky him!). *Interruption : Di just msged me...damn it, I cannot go!* Anyway I shall forget my obsession over belt :S

The good point s I just had had "Nasi Campur Tambak Bayan", how good was that? See I love my food :p YUMMY

P.S: One Tree Hill has obviously turn me into a zombie! I haven't been able to get myself a proper sleep due to the fact that my eyes have been glued to the TV watching every single episodes of One Tree Hill 1st Season. And damn it, two of the last episodes are jagged GRRRRR

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 2:18 PM

Did I win his heart?

That's a question that has been pounding around my head for the past few days. Did I or did I not? If I traced back to 2004, I think I didn't. But, if I asked people around, they said I triumphed his heart. Now, all I can do is to feel guilty, regret and sad. Had I been more sensitive, today would be a different story than now. Had I been more sensible, everything would take a better turn. When I met him recently, I tried to act as normal as I could, though, deep down in my heart, I wanted him to talk more, I wanted him to ask me out again like he used to, I wanted him to say "I missed you." The truth is all those will not happen and will never happen. I miss all those moments. I miss all those happy times we had last year. I tried to avoid him by not letting him knew that I was already back. Well apparently, I cannot go and hide forever, can I? Couple hours before I decided whether to give him a call or ignore him (eventually I decided not to call him), couple hours later, I met him. What a coincidence...do I call it a good coincidence or a bad one?

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 12:53 PM

Working my a** off!

Woahhh...nooo resttttttttttttttt for the whole week! Working from morning until night...One of the reason I hate working! Lucky my friend whom I met on Thursday. She's going to pursue her master degree! She told me she had seen so many people suffering from working...well hell that's true :(.

Throughout the whole exhibition, I didn't find anything interesting. Kinda boring this time around 'cos the exhibition was kinda lame and lack of visitors. A lot of showrooms were complaining about the lack of buyers. Is it because of the market or what?

And finally the exhibition was over yesterday and I had had dinner with Linda @ Duck King. (I skipped the exhibition on Saturday 'cos I had had dinner with Linda outside TP). I got my "One Tree Hill" DVD :). And watching it for 8 episodes...I lost track of time and I slept @ 5am this morning. Now feeling so sleepy and can barely keep my eyes open and it's still 1.30pm...4 1/2 - 5 1/2 hours more to go...woahhhhhhhhhhhhh why why why the long working hours????????? (but I arrived at my office around 11.30am today, thanks to One Tree Hill! *wink*).

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 1:30 PM

Frenzy games

Ok, I used to hate playing all these computer games but now, I gotta admit, I rather fancy them! xoxoxoxoxo...as far as I remembered,the very last computer game I'd ever played was "Counter Strike" (I hope I got the name right 'cos seriously I don't really remember it that well). It was my team (me and Teddy) vs. Yanto's team (Yanto and Cherry) hehehehe...of course my team won 'cos that gamer maniac Teddy was kinda skillfull and I was kinda hiding all the time hehehe (oh my, it was very fun, indeed). And now, after trying out 'Zuma and Tumble bugs', the lists have gone on and on. I am glued to these 'Luxor' and 'Pizza Frenzy'. Luxor is pretty hard to play. I kinda stuck @ level 9-6! arghhhhhhhhh

Playing computer games will make me become a computer geek sooner or later (oops), soon I will need to find another hobby ;). I am starting to buy books so that I can become a bookworm?LOL...well reading has never been bad, it's a good form of addiction rather than addicted to shopping, eating and games (don't ya agree?)....

Now, it's time to do my unfinish work...oh damn procrastination!

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 3:12 PM

An album that tells million stories...

There is the time when you do sit down somewhere and you think of how times have gone so fast. Just as I took out my photo album (the one with the WB on it), I flipped each pages and there I saw, images taken 3-5 years back. How everything reminds me of the happier time I had had when I was only 22-23 years old. How everything has changed since. Dramatic changes I meant. One of my friend on the picture is now happily married with a son and she is expecting her 2nd baby (congrats!), another one is luckily in love after both of us suffering from the terrible heartbreak 2 years ago ;), and the last one, whom I thought was one of the luckiest girl on earth, suffered what I said to be the most gruelling moment in life, breaking up with the fiancee :(.

Just as I reached the middle part of the album, there were two images of two li'l babies and only recently I met them (last month). How they have grown to be li'l girl and li'l boy now. They could not talk back then but now they speak fluently, as fluent as a parrot hehehe.

And @ the very few last pages, a picture of me and my former good friend. Kinda sad that 10 years of friendships had fallen apart.

You see, we cannot predict the future, can we? We used to bet who would get hitch first, who would have their first kids and so on. Everything went the other way round and none of our wild guess matched...we are not sidekick, after all, are we? hehehe

I learn the meaning of true friends. Who my true friends are and how some friends betray me.Prejudice people, Nymphos, Jerks, bastards...named them...I have met most of them and in that process, I am not that happy but they teach me valuable lesson. They shape me to become a better person. But I have to say the worst kind of people I have met is a sissy guy...how this one person whom he used to refer himself as a true man turned out to be nothing but a sissy boy, trying to gain symphaty from people. It worked in the beginning but well dirty tricks always fail in the end, so was his.

Anyway I have decided to replace these old images with the recent ones. So that one day when I found this album again, I would look back and smiled and said "How things have changed!"

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 11:55 PM

Liquid Kitchen

is a nice place indeed. Fancy the place straight away especially the place where I sat yesterday ;) Very creative, decorated with blue and orange as the based color and serving great food as well. I am dying to try their 'Chocolate Fondue' :p. I didn't feel well yesterday so I only ordered soup and shared a basket of potato wedges. I tried one of their mocktail, 'sexy (somethin')' and was quite good, very sweet :)

And here are Sastha and Dexter...very cute li'l babies

Plus now I am down with terrible flu and fever :( woahhhhhhhhhhh and I suffer from loads of bruises on my both hands (ouch). Is it because of the diet that I have been doing? No sodium no glucose? I do feel exhausted quite easily and kinda losing the whole energy. I did eat something salty, though, today. Garlic bread. And I drank something sweet, Hot cocoa. Maybe, I am just missing "terang bulan" so much (slurpppppppp)...

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 11:31 PM

One morning when we talked about death

Watched CSI Miami, couldn't sleep, decided to have a bit of chat with some friends, ended with the topic of 'death'.

Something that nobody can avoid. It's a misery of life.

My friend asked me "Are you scared?"

"Scared of what?" said me

"Death," he replied.

I answered, "No."

He then asked me why I wasn't afraid of facing death. I explained to him 'the reason'.

He said "I'm afraid that I haven't done more good stuffs to people. I haven't made other people smile on their sadness/misery."

I told him that's the reason you should start doing something good from now onwards. We can "deposit" of being good and doing something good whilst we have the time.

"I am ready to face death anytime. Natural death I presume," I said.

Then we continued our conversations about what we would do before the time had come for us.

Pretty crazy,huh? One heck morning :p

I suppose sometime it's alright to discuss about it. We are just curious about the misery of death. We have no idea what will happen after death. Will our lives end after it or there will be another life, kind of immortal? I just cannot imagine....what I can do now, keep breathing, be brave, smile and face this world. For all I know I haven't planned to write down my will (as if I have any) just yet, all I wanna do for tomorrow (or I must say later on today...darn it's 3 min to 5 in the morning!) is to have KFC! here I come big meal :)

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 3:41 AM

Why don't you kill me?

You hate me

You named me a devil and a bitch

You banned me from friendships

You want everyone to hate me as much as you do

You want to make the whole world knows what you have opinioned about me

You destroy my images

You twisted every stories

You make gossips on me

AND

I do not hate you, it's just that I do not respect you anymore

I call you a jerk for sure (one day, you will be call a bastard)

I banned you, too, just from me, not from the world 'cos there is no hope of friendships

I do not want everyone to hate you, I spare you from being hatred by keeping my mouth shut (If I did open my mouth, you would be a goner)

I do not make unnecessary comments on you when no one asks, unlike you spreading some diseases

I do not attempt to destroy your images 'cos I am telling people the truth, vice versa for you

I do not twist the stories

I don't make gossips on you (apparently your no.1 skills is to gossip and to lie and to talk bad things about your own friends to me)

And here's what I got...

bunch of foes, thanks to you. Sometime when all we do is to help, the other parties seem to try so hard to destroy you completely.

I wish I were born as evil as you are...then of course, I would win this game long before you do.

I play things fair and square. To my surprise, a gentleman like you cheat the games. Ah well, a devil is a devil, though I am no saint, at least I don't want and I will not make your world turns upside down like you have done to me.

Let's the world judge us.

Just one more question, Why don't you just kill me? That's the only thing you have not done so far...whilst you can, go and kill me. I won't scream. After all, I am dying now.

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 2:11 AM

I was there but you walked away

There was that day when the place was packed with people. It did bother me, the whole crowds until I saw you. I saw you were smilling, but I wasn't sure if you were giving that beautiful smile of yours to me. I looked around, to check out the crowds but suddenly there were only you and me there, just the two of us. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. So I stood there in silence hoping that you would walk away. You did not. You approached me. I muttered something and took a deep breath, ready to listen to every single bad words you would unleashed. Instead, you smiled and said "Hi! Long time no see". I was taken aback. To my surprised, I did too say hi and smiled back. Then there was the long chat but it was pleasant. And it's time to say good-bye and we went off. I didn't look back, neither did you.

Then something woke me up. I sat in my bed for sometime, thinking why there was the smile and the friendly gesture whilst you were supposed to hate me. I made you hated me. You made everyone hated me, but I never hate you. You told the whole world bad things about me, hoping everyone would be my foes, I have not said something unnecessary to people about you. I spared your friendships but you gave me foes in return. Though, it was only a dream but it bothered me so much. I concluded to myself, it must be a sign, a warning sign that he hated me like mad and he didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore. I checked my phone, nothing unusual, no missed calls or smses. I checked my emails, still the very same. So I said, forget it.

A phone call broke my train of thoughts. I saw my phone screen and I smiled. Here's the reality and the fact. Here's no dreams or bull. We would have dinner. He picked me up and I thanked God that I have him now and not that "him" in my dream earlier (they're two different guys). After all the better man always win :) All I can say, welcome back "Relationship" and good-bye "Jerk!"

Cecilia walked through the seasons at 1:32 AM